Selffish?

So today i learned that i am selfish. i think about myself, i dont care what other people have to do, and all i care about is what im doing and what benefits me. I guess i been like that for quite a long time. Maybe ive always been like this. Well i realized this all today just because i had no way on getting home. Earlier during the week i asked my mother if it was okay to instead of going to bible study today if i can go to my cousins house instead so i can help her with the choreo for her cotillion and also to do some group work for our upcoming project. she seemed okay with the me asking so i assumed she said yes. so today is the day i went to go to my cousins house everything went fine despite the fact we didnt even dance. but then i needed a ride home. at this point i had no way home everyone left her house but at my house everyone was home my sister, mother and father. I didnt want to bother asking my mom and dad because they would get hella pissed at me and as of right now i hella dont want to hear that Bullshit. Anyway, so i asked my sister, she hella sed no even tho i understand that shes sick but i bet 1 million bucks shed get up out of her window and sneak out to go see her boyfriend than to just get in the car and pick me up. she told me that i only think about myself and i never care about what other people have to do. i then talked to my mom knowing that i am going to get in trouble so then i did. she hella yelled at me on the phone saying that i need to find my way home and i always have excuses to hang out and i only care about myself. basically same shit i been hearing for about well over 5 years. I had thoughts of walking home, i really wanted to it would have given me alone time to think and have alone time. But atleast my brother was going to get me. my brother is always there for me. i love my brother...too bad he moved out it would have been so much better if he stayed at home. i miss those days when he lived here. i want him to know that he is the perfect brother a boy can have. i understand why he wasnt able to take me home. back to the subject, at this time i have no way of getting home...i text my bestfriend kristine to see if a friend is at church maybe possibly i can get a ride with her but she sed she wasnt there. but being the perfect bestfriend she found a ride for me. Its like wow! do i really deserve this? i havent been acting as a bestfriend to her and yet she found a ride for me, shes always there for me, shes a great bestfriend and i love her dearly. thanks jeff (kristines brother) for taking me home. this situation teaches me that bestfriends will always be there for you no matter what happens between the two of you if you feel like your not yourself or even if you barely talk....if that made any sense haha. well today was crazyy im glad i got home safely God brought me home. oh and sorry for all the cursing i usually dont curse i was just heated thats all.

February 18, 2009

Today was a good day. I went to the gym today to work out along with my cousin Justine and some friends: Jelena, Sunny, Jesse Quoc and Thanh. It was fun the last time i went to the gym was last thursday before japanese class for night school. speaking of nightschool im dropping out. I decided im not going to SFSTATE anymore, i decided to go to either The Academy Of Art University or The Art Institute. I have my mind more open to The Academy Of Art University. Deng today my laptop got a virus!!! but i learned i can reboot my computer. Although it deleted everything i had on my laptop. I have to re-download everything i had. Maybe i shouldnt so then my laptop will stay working fast. Im just going to download Photoshop :] oh! and aim n itunes. im going to the gym again tomorrow with the same people im excited im going to run this time. i didnt do any running today cause i decided to go to the gym unexpectedly so i was at the gym in my Metallic Vs jeepers they got mad creased. oh well ill buy new ones. sike! ill get Coolgrey IVs yum!!! suede. hahaa.

College.

So today I've come to realize that i need to be serious about my choice of college i want to go to. Senior year is coming to an end and im gonna miss it terribly. It's sad just thinking about how Highschool is coming to an end, i really wish i was a freshmen again. But now i got accepted into SFSTATE and im going there but i am thinking twice about that school. for what i want to do in life...it will be pointless to go there. I am going to major in Photography and Fashion Design. Schools great for that are:

1. Brooks institute
2. Academy Of Art University
3. The Art Institute
4. FiDM

Im looking more forward into The Academy Of Art University because of the wide variety of courses they have to offer. I may end up choosing that school instead. I hope i have the money for that school. That's where FAFSA comes in...It is so confusing! like really i hate it im not even done!!! deadlines are on March 2 it really just make me feel like dsjvheiucvhjoewr9gfvioerucgtfm0we9999rioghqeori'qgjergpe!?!?!?!?!?!!!!! ughhh i just want to get it over with and start on my own career: Photographer and Fashion Designer. I hope i make it big in the near future.

Testimony.

My last blog i posted got me thinking and made me want to write more about my religious background.

Alot of people wonder why i chose to become a CHRISTIAN. Well i look at it as a better path for me to live life for Christ. I come from a huge Catholic family...well i call it a STRICT catholic family. (You know how filipino familys are) anyway like i said i come from a strict catholic family meaning it is disrespectful to change religions, pray the rosary at least once a day, hail mother mary, go to confession every week. but, it wasnt really the right path for me. Becoming a Christian is an amazing experience filled with tears and happpyness. I started going to bible studies last year during mid feb. so almost a year. i actually enjoyed it! as being catholic i would fall asleep during church and wish to never go, always trying to find reasons not to go...pretending im sleeping. but i enjoy bible studies. i started to get more into it and started to go to more youth events and a christian church. July 5, 2008 I accepted jesus Christ in my heart as my lord and savior at my church's family camp. Right then and there GOD became my first priority. I have made this decision while my parents were in the philippines so they had no clue about this. when i came back from camp i tried telling my mom about my conversion but it was too hard. i talked to her about getting saved she told me she already accepted him in her heart but im not too sure she knew what i was talking about. so my parents come back home. it took about 2 months to tell my mother about me converting into christianity. September 4, 2008 the day i got baptized as a Christian the day i was reborn. that day i was asking my mom if i can go to a baptism i didnt want to say that i was getting baptized because i knew she would stop me from going. as soon as i asled her about it she said why? your getting baptized? i didnt want to lie so i tokd the truth. she was yelling at me for about 1 hour, i was bursting into tears telling her how much ive changed and how christianity is a better path for me. But she still wouldnt listen. this is what she said to me "You are a liar! you told me that your only going to bible study, and you didnt say that your going to become a christian", "You are brainwashed!", "Get out of my face!!!" by hearing those hurtful words from my own mother i still stayed in the kitchen cause i wanted to prove my point. I looked at my mom and noticed her crying and now i felt guilt thinking why did i do this i hate seeing my mom cry. but i wanted to do what i felt was right for me i have faith that GOD chose this path for me. so i was still standing in the kitchen and my mom said about 3 more times "Get out of my face!!!" so i did i didnt want to make her more angry, and i still went to the baptism. so i went to the baptism making it seem like nothing happened cause i didnt want my church to worry. but that day i got baptized as a Christian. Too bad my mom and dad werent there i wish they could have been there. so my life as a Christian is AMAZING! I read my bible everyday, go to bible study every friday, LOVE to worship GOD anytime, anywhere. I just dont go to church, only because my parents wont let me. once im 18 ill be at my christian church every sunday. other than that everything is getting better my relationship with my mother got better, she still tells me my dad is still mad at me for becoming a christian but hopefully one day they will understand. its all in GODs time. despite everything my parents have done or said to me i still love them to death for who they are, they raised a great boy and i hope they are proud of me. im still living my life day after day praying for the best for my parents to understand. one day, and when that day comes when my family understands my situation with Christ and my whole conversion into chirstianity...ill be filled with tears and happyness once again. I Love You Jesus Christ!

New years wish.

well i havent been writing here in a long time. Jelena gets mad at me cause i never blog even tho i tell her that i will. imma try and do this everyday now haha. well last friday during bible study i was asked a question...what would be my new years wish? and why? well my new years wish would be for my family to get saved. if you are christian you would understand why i said that. In the BIBLE in the book of John Chapter 14 verse 6 it says jesus answered, i am the way the truth and the life, knowone comes to the father except through me. basically that says that the only way to get to heaven is through Jesus Christ. You would have to accept Jesus Christ in your heart as your lord and savior. basically you are born as sinners...everyone is condemned to go to hell but by accepting jesus christ in your hearts you are SAVED. you build that relationship with christ. so thats why my new years wish is for my family to get saved. why? because i want to see them in heaven... I love them dearly...but, my parents seem to not understand.

January 6, 2009

Hello Blogspot!
well this is my first time using blogspot, Jelena did my first blog. Im soooo tired right now. its really late but im ecited for tomorrow. i have cotillion practice and my iphone comes in the mail. how fun is that? im so hungry right now even tho i just ate taco bell. this blogspot thang is pretty dope its like a journal thing, im actually talking to myself. i bet if people read this they gon think that i am crazy. but there are days when i feel like i should write when im feeling upset and blogspot will come in handy. mann for a first blog this sucks. too bad im not feeling down right now if i was i would have had alot to write about and it would be interesting. oh well i guess this is just an introduction :] Hi Jelena Lecitona wherever you be. Goodnight&GODbless.

First blog.

So, I joined this bkoz Leng told me too. And now, I'm going to blog everyday to talk about my inner most feelings everyday. Okay, bye.